Courage

Most people have a list of things the want to accomplish in their lives. This list can include the grand and world changing, such as get elected president of the United States, or the small, such as learn to ride a horse. You can have many or few things on the list, but rare is the person who has absolutely no goals that they wish to accomplish.

Goals are great, as they help to create momentum and positive change in our lives. Without goals, I would still weigh 350 lbs and I would not be writing this blog. In fact, many studies have shown that people who have written goals accomplish far more in their lives than people who have none.

The problem is not with the goals. It is with the reasons. Lying next to that list of goals in our heads, many of us have a list of reasons that we do not accomplish them. Here was my list of reasons for not losing weight:

I don't have time to exercise
I don't have time to cook, so I go for the easier fast food
I am addicted to food
I have a genetic predisposition to weight gain
If only I could start over, I would be able to maintain my weight
My life is too stressful. I have to eat to cope

As you can see, although I called these "reasons," they are really just excuses. If you examine why you have not achieved all of your goals, you will probably find a similar list of "reasons."

When you come right down to it, virtually none of these excuses are true. The reason behind the excuses is fear.

Though I had (and believed) my list of excuses, the fact of the matter was that I was afraid to really commit to losing weight. What if I failed?

I was afraid of what my friends and family would think of me.
I was afraid of what I would think of me. Did that make me a failure? I was afraid of being a failure.

Fear is a powerful emotion. It's power is mainly rooted in its ability to paralyze. When you are afraid, you will not act. This paralysis kept me from taking productive action against my obesity for years.

Fear is also weak. Though it seems all consuming, it is often based upon concerns or ideas which are just plain wrong. Yet when we believe them, we cannot move.

Thus, there is an antidote to fear. It is called courage. Courage is the ability to act despite fear. We usually ascribe courage to heroes, who run into burning buildings, and falsely believe that they are not afraid. They feel fear just like you and me, but have a reason for acting that is stronger than the fear. Thus, they act in spite of it.

Overcoming fear is a two step process:

1. Examine your reason for fear: Often times, if you simply ask the question "what am I afraid of?" you will notice that your reason just doesn't make sense, or is something minor that you don't need to be afraid of.
2. Act: Even if your reason for fear is valid, if the goal is something that you want to achieve, just moving in the right direction can snap the paralysis and reduce or eliminate the fear.

The most important thing to remember is that fear should be a counselor. It is there to warn you of a potential danger identified by your mind. It should not be a jailor. It should not keep you from acting to achieve your goals. Identify the fear, and its source, and you will find the courage to overcome.